There are certain things in life that we want to do, that we must do and that unfortunately we lack the courage to do so. We may know that on the other side of that decision everything will be fine, but still, we remain prisoners of the past and unhappy in the present.
I already knew for several months that my hair was damaged. I could clearly see that my ends were becoming more and more refined, that split ends were present and continued to form... And, despite everything, I did not do what had to be done. I cut here and there a few millimeters when I saw that my curled styles were really no longer beautiful and as defined. But the problem was still there, and I lived with it as if nothing was happening. I was playing blind as the split ends gained confidence. On a single hair strand I could have 2, 3 and even 4.
It was heartbreaking to see my hair getting damaged, but I still didn't have the courage to uproot the problem. And the more time passed, the more hair had to be cut and the more courage I needed to do so. Fortunately, the will was there. As tiny as it was, it held on.
Naturally, I began to imagine myself with shorter hair. I looked at my wash and go photos, but this time with a different eye. I like my shrinkage, why can't I cut my hair then? I wondered.
Then came the day when I finally made my appointment after visiting the hair salon website several times over the past three months. I was ready! I was ready to prove to myself that I could count on me to make the right choices and keep the promises made to myself. I was ready to really prioritize the health of my hair over its length. I was ready to start a new journey.
On D-Day, I was the one telling the hairdresser to cut even more and she was the one freaking out. I was sure of my decision, and I wanted at all costs to leave the salon with the result I wanted. And I did exactly that!
Before this experience, I did not know that I was so attached to my hair. I was afraid of no longer recognizing myself with shorter hair. I had unknowingly attached myself to a physical trait to define myself. Some would say it's just hair. But the day I decided to cut my hair, I chose myself. I accepted who I really am inside of me and not who I saw in the mirror. Honestly, I thought I had already taken that step of self-acceptance. But this experience made me realize that self-love, self-acceptance is a journey that never ends. We learn, we grow, we improve, and we always have to move forward.
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